I can’t have him but . . .

Torchsongs for mourning the unrequited love of straight men

Amen.

Why? Whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?

Oh James, what a roller-coaster through hell you describe.

When you’re a gay man

and

it’s not you but a woman instead . . .

… arrrgh!

Silly me,

I used to weep huge salty pools over an unrequited love to this tune:

Here’s some more Nina Simone for Chloe.

I’m not going to call. Not going to write. Not going to think about . . .

You wrote, “Wasted a good year not finding a boyfriend who could actually return my feelings.”

Solid Gold’s Dionne Warwick, before becoming a Psychic Friend, sang about the same feeling with, “A fool will waste tomorrow reaching back to yesterday.”

I’ve spent some quality fool-time with that torch song:

Here I go, head-over-heels again . . .

Then there was

this one delightful boy

in college . . .

I was a junior and he was a freshman.

That

one turned into

something

really

twisted.

This ended up being the soundtrack of that affair that never really was, at least in my head:

Let’s both hope all of those heartaches have left us with enough sense to dodge that straight-boy bullet again. Or redouble our efforts to find a “gay-pill.”

Here from the bottomless bag of cover songs is that reminder lesson should you ever need it: